Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Mets’ need their all-time lost opportunity to be a Dodgers aberration - New York Post

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Why do all the stupid people think Donald J. Trump is stupid?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Why do I feel worthless most of the time?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Is it socially acceptable for individuals to wear clothing typically associated with the opposite gender? What are some reasons for or against this practice?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Is it true that Jehovah's witnesses once thought the world would end in 1975?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What are some tips for braiding a woman's hair on a date?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I see through liars

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

FDA chief wary of federal recommendations for Covid-19 vaccines - Politico

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Dow Jones Futures Rise, Broadcom Falls After Tesla Crashes On Musk-Trump Feud - Investor's Business Daily

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Water Discovered Around a Young, Sun-Like Star For First Time - ScienceAlert

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t cotton to rapists

Can women learn to squirt?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can read

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How is bestiality wrong, but killing animals for sport or trophies is considered okay?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

What are some examples of unofficial acts by presidents?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand how hurricane paths work

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can count

I have a reading level above third grade

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.